“Cute Tall Guy Drunk” – I honestly have no idea who this is. I probably nabbed it during a night out with the girls after one too many vodka and cranberries. And no, I’m not going to text him and ask him his name and what his face looks like.
“Do Not Answer” – We all have one of these in our phones. Mine’s a British guy I met at an after-hours bar one night called the Republican who lit cats on fire as a hobby.
Some girl I knew in college who I hung out with once – I kinda remember her not being fun and tentative plans for brunch. That was six years ago.
This girl my guy friend was hitting on at a bar and I felt sorry for her – Yah, never gonna call her either.
Courtney – I honestly have no idea who this is.
Friend’s Ex Boyfriend – I really have no idea how I ended up with this number. My friend probably didn’t have her phone one night and asked that I contact her BF if I needed to get a hold of her. Regardless, I’m never going to call this person except to say, “YOU PIECE OF !@#$!!! YOU KNOW WHAT YOUUUU DIIIDDDD $%^$#@$^ *&^^!!!”
“Girl in Duck Costume” – Yes, it honestly says “Girl in Duck Costume.” IDK.
My Ex from 2007 – That was a good relationship, but I’m pretty sure he’s married w/ children now and we haven’t spoken since MySpace was still a thing.
Domino’s – Because honestly, this is just pathetic.
“Dean OkCupid” – We went on one date and I wanted to put a fork through my face. There’s obviously not going to be a second date, so why do I still have his number?